Some of life's crucial turning points are recognizable only in retrospect, when we look back and discover that decisions we made thoughtlessly or casually, actually changed the whole direction of our existence.
Sometimes, we’re keenly aware of the intensity of that struggle, but our difficulty in perception is one of the reasons we need so deeply to seek the guidance of God. A crucial turning point in the life of Jacob was when he wrestled through the night with God by the Jabbock. Jacob was basically a con man in the process of moving from being a man who lived by his wits (his name really meant "thief"), to a man of faith whose name would be "Israel," meaning “one who prevails with God". Jacob grew up in what today we would call a dysfunctional family and he deceived his blind father Isaac into giving him the blessing that Isaac intended to give to Esau, Jacob’s brother. The heavenly blessing for Jacob came like many of ours do. He was in trouble and was fleeing from the scene of his actions. Alone and sleeping on the ground with a rock for a pillow, he had a vision in a dream. It was of God meeting him in his crisis, showing him his path to glory. Jacob found out that God is bigger than he had previously thought him to be. It’s a mark of grace that God brings assurance to this flawed and imperfect man and blesses the world through him. God didn't wait for the day when Jacob changed his attitudes and made up for his mistakes. He simply declared his intention to use and bless Jacob's life. It’s amazing that God, who knows all about our weaknesses, reaches through them to trust us with his purpose. We don't have to clean up our act, just so we can deserve that. In fact, we can never do enough to deserve it, because it’s a gift from God and it’s called Grace. Sometimes, when we get into a real encounter with God, we find that we’re also in a wrestling match, a struggle with the one who made us.In that experience is some probing, contained in God's question, "What is your name?" The probing of the essence of who we are. In Jacob’s case, his answer was, "I am Jacob, a deceiver, a thief, a con man and a manipulator." But God's answer was NOT ANYMORE, YOU’RE NOT. You’re more than that and I will name you ISRAEL – a prince who prevails with God. In wrestling with God, we find him holding up a mirror in front of us - and we must face up to what we are. This is so that we can experience the conviction of our sins and shortcomings. It's the essence of the call for us to repent, when we need to feel sorrow over what we are and what we’ve done. We’re called to turn away from the old life and embrace the new. Have you ever noticed that in bible stories, wherever food is present, Jesus is also there? As often as he was praying, he was sharing food. Without food, we’re often cranky and confused and tend to lose our way, become disoriented, even lose our balance. When the Israelites wandered in the wilderness, they were given manna to eat. It wasn’t fancy, just something to fill their tummies. However, the people became so bored with eating manna day after day that they complained to God. Yet, when you think about it, they were being fed and it kept them alive. They didn’t recognise it as a blessing from God. Today’s gospel story tells another story of food – lots of food - in fact, so much food, that they have heaps left over! This isn’t a banquet like the wedding of Cana story in John’s gospel, but it’s about food to tide one over, food for a journey, simple food: bread and fish. The people on that hillside long ago, weren’t friends and family gathered for an occasion. They were just people who had wandered away from homes, seeking Jesus. Seeking a blessing from him in the words that he spoke. We know the story as “The Feeding of the 5,000” and it’s one of the many miracles of Jesus. Those of us, either enlightened, or listening closely, know that it was actually many more than 5,000 people. The count was taken of men, but then Matthew adds “besides women and children”. How many would that be altogether, do you think? 10,000? 12,000? So, did it really happen exactly as Matthew records? Where did the food come from? What did they do with the 12 baskets of leftovers? Questions like these are so often the focus of discussion of this story. But is this even what the story is really about? There are many discussions about this story, many theories about it, from the conviction that it was an outright miracle of Jesus producing multiple and more-than-sufficient fishes and loaves, to the idea that the people produced the food from their satchels when prodded to share. There’s really no way to know, but this may not be the point of the story. Whichever way it happened, is this really a story about food? Consider again that the story we have of Jesus says: “Jesus withdrew in a boat to a lonely place apart.” What we’re not told in reading just today’s portion is that he was in that boat, withdrawing, because he’d just learned of the death of John, his cousin - John who had baptized him in the River Jordan. It wasn’t the best of times for Jesus. He was just trying to get a moment of peace to talk to God and reflect. And according to the gospel, when the crowds heard that he was near, that he was drawing apart, they followed him. As they followed, he didn’t tell them to go away, but instead he blessed them. He fed them, he talked to them and after they had left, he again went off to be by himself. He set out to do one thing: to get some space and some time away. This proved to be difficult for him, as we read in today’s story. Does this sound familiar to you? Rest, time apart, a few minutes alone, a break, some space – it’s something that we all seek at the end of a busy day. Jesus was interrupted and responded graciously - and then went on with what he was doing. Parents recognize this dynamic, so do people with demanding jobs, family obligations, social responsibilities – this dynamic is very likely familiar to all of us. Finding time alone in this COVID environment is difficult. We get involved in what we’re doing, and we don’t want to be interrupted or distracted, and so we ignore what’s nudging us for attention. Jesus withdrew and was constantly interrupted by people clamouring for attention: Teach us! Heal us! Give us food! Prove yourself! Jesus sought time apart, time for himself, quiet time, but he was interrupted. Yet, with grace and care, he healed the sick and somehow found food for the hungry. Through all his interruptions, Jesus was abundant in his distribution of grace. Yes, the story is about food, but consider that it’s also about blessing, about goodwill, about God’s abundant grace. Jesus fed not only their bodies, but also their spirits. This is the message that I get from our readings today: God’s grace is available in abundance. In living the Christian life we’re blessed by him every day and it’s up to us to recognise those blessings and give him thanks in return. We are blessed to be a blessing…………Pastor Rick
4 Comments
Gaye Brill
1/8/2020 12:07:24 pm
I am reminded that so often the blessing we give can almost instantly return the blessing. A smile to a stranger in the street is often instantly returned these days - and both parties instantly have their spirits lifted.
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Heather Andrews
1/8/2020 08:36:15 pm
Thanks for your message, Rick. Much to dwell on. Heather
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Peter Andrews
3/8/2020 08:49:13 am
Elegant written Pastor Rick drawing out important themes for us to ponder
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3/8/2020 01:28:13 pm
I like the story of Jacob because it reminds me we don't need to be 'good' or 'perfect' people to be fit for God's purposes. I also identify with the wrestling match with God - the discernment of which way to go at the crossroads. I don't always appreciate the wrestle, but looking back I know it's good for me!
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